Pines People - Jay Pagano

Jay Pagano: A Life of Devotion, Courage, and Leadership in Fire Island Pines 

Jay Pagano. Photo by Jim Cox

Jay Pagano’s path to becoming one of the most impactful figures in Fire Island Pines history began far from its sun-drenched boardwalks. Born and raised in Baltimore, Maryland, Jay came of age during a time of sweeping societal change. He graduated from Bucknell University in 1967 with a degree in American History. Inspired by events like the Civil Rights Movement and the creation of programs like Medicare, upon graduation, Jay pursued a law degree at George Washington University. He began his legal career in Washington, D.C., focusing on employment discrimination, particularly ageism, a form of bias not explicitly protected under the Civil Rights Act. 

Although he came of age amidst historic societal upheaval, Jay’s most defining transformations were personal. After a brief marriage to a woman who was his college sweetheart and giving birth to a daughter, he came out as a gay man in 1972, an act of courage in an era of secrecy and stigma.

That same year, he met his first partner, Gayle. Together, they navigated a double life familiar to many gay men at the time - joyful social circles within the underground gay community, paired with the need to remain closeted in their professional lives. 

In 1973, friends invited Jay and Gayle to Fire Island Pines. Excited, they arrived on a grey August day, completely unprepared for what they would encounter. Compared to the conservative, closeted atmosphere of Washington, D.C., the wild abandon of the Pines was overwhelming.  

“It was like Sodom and Gomorrah!” as Jay would later describe it.   He and Gayle beat a hasty retreat to D.C. 

A few years later, Jay was invited back by a mentor, who helped him see the island with new eyes. This time, something about the experience clicked and left a lasting impression. He fell in love with the beach, the people, and the rare freedom to live openly. That summer, he even stayed at Cherry Grove’s legendary all-male, clothing-optional hotel.  It was, as he noted, “a pretty wild time.” 

In 1977, Jay joined his mentor’s share house on Pine Walk. He was solo because Gayle was in the military and stationed in what was then called West Germany. Among his housemates was photographer Tom Bianchi, who would later become famous for capturing the beauty and intimacy of gay life on Fire Island in popular coffee table books and gallery shows. Those housemates became Jay’s chosen family, a community that would endure for decades.  

These were the best of times. Jay built a new network of friends and fell deeply in love with the Pines, its rustic beauty and a community where he could relax and be himself.

Two years later, when presented with a rent increase for the house on Pines Walk of 33%, Jay and two friends made a bold move and bought a house on Sky Walk for $100,000.  It was a significant step for a young man still living and working in D.C. But Jay was undeterred. He was putting down roots in a place that had already become part of his identity. 

Jay Pagano. Photo by Tom Bianchi

Then came AIDS. 

New York Times, Section A20, Friday, July 3rd 1981

The early 1980s brought devastation to the Pines. AIDS swept through the community with terrifying speed. In 1981, Jay lost his first housemate, Nick Rock, at just 28 years old. Suddenly, the island paradise became a place of fear and sorrow. Entire groups of housemates were wiped out and many houses stood empty. Familiar faces faded into frail shadows of themselves, marked by lesions, hospital gowns, and IV bags. Each weekend brought a new wave of dread: Who’s sick now? Who’s gone? 

During the height of the AIDS crisis, Jay lived a divided life, working a demanding government job in Washington, D.C. and embracing new responsibilities as a caregiver, financial provider, and supporter of friends stricken by the disease. At one point he was caring for his dying former partner Gayle in Washington and traveling to visit his current partner Jerry, who was hospitalized and being cared for by his mother in New York. By 1990, he had lost them both.

At this time there was little institutional support for people living with AIDS and so Jay and his friends built their own safety net, raising money for those who could no longer afford basic needs. Many times, he had to choose between a commitment to visit a sick friend or attending a funeral—two obligations that often fell on the same day.  

If the stresses of the epidemic were not enough, through it all Jay had to deal with a homophobic boss who denied him time off for caregiving and scrutinized his personal life. It was very dark time in his life. But as he noted he chose to move forward, feeling both grateful and guilty for his own health. 

Throughout this time the Pines continued to play an important part of Jay’s life. Although the epidemic created financial stresses, like finding housemates who would help him pay the mortgage on his home, it was a rare place where he could experience moments of laughter and joy. He later said, “The Pines was where I could feel free, even when everything else felt lost.” 

By the 1990s the worst parts of the plague had passed, bringing some relief to the gay community. There was a glimmer of light on the horizon and social life picked up. In 1995, Jay’s life took a new turn when he met Mark Fortier who was an unexpected guest at a luncheon he was hosting. They hit it off and two years later, Jay moved to New York to be with Mark. The move marked the beginning of a new and happier chapter.  

Mark Fortier and Jay Pagano

Now living in New York and encouraged by then President Alan Brockman (left), Jay joined the board of the Fire Island Pines Property Owners Association (FIPPOA) in 1997. This move marked the beginning of an epic journey for Jay and the Pines.

Jay quickly became a key figure in the civic and cultural life of the Pines. His first initiative was helping to organize the Morning Party, a popular beach party benefitting Gay Men’s Health Crisis (GMHC).

When the Morning Party ended in 1998, he and colleagues Richard Winger and Randy Wilson helped launch its successor, the Pines Party the following summer. It revived a beloved tradition of community beach extravaganzas, and evolved into one of the Pines’ signature events, raising funds for HIV/AIDS organizations and supporting the needs of the island. 

Pines Party 2025

Jay went on to serve on the FIPPOA board for more than 25 years, including four years as Vice President and ten as President from 2009 to 2019. His tenure left a lasting legacy. Before becoming President, he worked with longtime Pines resident Laura Hartstein to raise over $3 million to build Whyte Hall, the community center named for benefactor John Whyte. This facility has since became a focal point for cultural and civic activities in the Pines, including community meetings and events produced by the Fire Island Pines Arts Project and the Fire Island Dance Festival. 

Whyte Hall. Photo courtesy of Scott Bromley

As President, Jay worked with board members and local leaders to implement major infrastructure upgrades, including rebuilding boardwalks and the harbor, improving utilities, and securing reliable cell and internet service.

He oversaw two major beach replenishment efforts, including recovery from Superstorm Sandy. In 2020, during his final year as President, he guided the community through the COVID-19 pandemic, coordinating with public health experts, business leaders, and local officials to protect residents and visitors alike. 

One of the defining features of Jay’s tenure on FIPPOA was his resilience. Doing anything on a remote barrier island and in a community renowned for high standards and expectations is no easy matter. Though the FIPPOA board members are essentially unpaid volunteers, they were not exempt from criticism, derision, and even lawsuits from those unhappy with their decisions. Still, for over a decade, Jay pressed forward, leading by example and always choosing what was right over what was easy.  

As FIPPOA board member Gary Clinton (on the right) said:

“Jay led by inspiration. He never asked anyone to do something he himself would not do.  He worked hard to find middle-ground solutions when various interest groups needed to be brought together. He took on tough challenges and succeeded.” 

Jay’s leadership strengthened both the physical and financial foundations of the Pines and FIPPOA.  He helped implement changes to bring the community into compliance with local, state, and federal regulations, and put the Pines on a path toward long-term sustainability. He also gave his voice, time and money in support of community events and service providers to ensure the Pines never lost its joy and continued to be a place where everyone was welcome.

By the time Jay stepped down as President, the Pines had evolved from a seasonal resort into a more sustainable, inclusive, and resilient community, with the infrastructure to support both work and play. Not surprisingly the community has since seen a surge in new homeowners and rising property values, a testament to the foundation he helped build. 

When discussing his many accomplishments, Jay is quick to share credit.

“None of these things were done by me alone,” he said. “I had extraordinarily talented colleagues on the board and in the community who were a privilege to work with.”   

What is for certain, Jay was a much loved and respected leader, who exemplified selfless leadership. As FIPPOA board member Russell Saray (right) noted: 

“He took on massive projects, got them done and never asked for a thank you.” 

During the time he was serving on FIPPOA, Jay also found personal fulfillment. In 2012, he married Mark, formalizing a relationship rooted in shared values, mutual support and eternal love. For Jay, and for the Pines, their wedding, held at Whyte Hall and on the beach at sunset, symbolized how far things had come since the previous era of secrecy, suffering and marginalization.

Jay Pagano and Mark Fortier

But while Jay’s marriage to Mark is a source of deep happiness, his bond with the Pines is no less enduring. As he once reflected, his relationship with the community has had all the hallmarks of a lifelong partnership — steadfast in hardship, grounded in commitment, and built on shared purpose. 

Today, Fire Island Pines remains a unique and vibrant place, and continues to be defined by beauty, freedom, and connection. It has evolved over its 70+ year history into a gay mecca and a place people can be their authentic selves.

What has sustained it through change and challenge are people like Jay Pagano: a volunteer, a leader, a builder, and above all, someone who showed up when it mattered most. Through his hard work, humanity and dedication, Jay helped move the community forward, while retaining its authenticity. His example, and the values he embodies, will stand among his most enduring legacies to a community he loves dearly.